You’re the boss. You have it all together, or at least you think you do. What happens every time your phone dings, buzzes, or chirps? Be honest.
Do you feel your body tighten? Do your shoulders tense up? Does your heart race? Do you get that pit in your stomach and think, “Oh God, what now?”
You’ve been walking around with that “I dare you to try me, I am not the one” energy lately, and while it’s giving “power move,” it’s also giving “I’m barely holding it together.” Can you relate? If you’ve been feeling irritable, out of control, and like you’re doing everything in your power to keep it together, have you stopped to ask yourself what might be contributing to these feelings?
Newsflash: Your phone notifications could be the reason. Every alert leaves you feeling frazzled, anxious, and about two notifications away from throwing your phone out the window.
The Notification Trap
As a high-powered woman, leader, or boss in your field, the demand for your attention can feel constant, and the pressure to be on feels real. You might believe that being an effective leader means being available 24/7, responding immediately to every notification, and staying perpetually plugged in. The reality is that this approach is unsustainable and harmful to your mental health.
Research shows that constant interruptions from notifications increase stress levels, reduce focus, and contribute to burnout. When your body reacts to a notification as if it’s an emergency, your nervous system remains in a heightened state of alertness. Over time, this takes a toll on your mental and physical well-being, leading to feelings of overwhelm, irritability, and even resentment.
Positive Boss Moves to Reclaim Your Peace
Being the boss doesn’t mean being glued to your phone. It means setting boundaries that allow you to lead effectively without sacrificing your well-being. Here are some strategies to help you maintain open communication while protecting your mental health:
1. Set Designated Communication Hours
Communicate clear boundaries with your team or colleagues about when you’re available. For example, tell them you’ll respond to emails or messages during specific time windows each day. Communicating clearly manages expectations and helps you carve out uninterrupted time to focus on deep work or recharge.
2. Turn Off Non-Essential Notifications
Not every notification deserves your immediate attention. Audit your phone settings and turn off notifications for apps that aren’t critical. For essential apps, consider silencing notifications during non-work hours.
3. Leverage Technology Wisely
Tech doesn’t have to be your enemy. Use tools like auto-reply messages, scheduling apps, or project management platforms to streamline communication. For instance, you can set an email auto-response to acknowledge receipt and provide a follow-up timeline. Using these tools give you breathing room while keeping things professional.
4. Delegate Like a Pro
You don’t have to handle everything personally. Empower your team to handle issues independently and manage the day-to-day. Build trust, set clear expectations, and then—here’s the key—let them do the thing. When your team feels capable and supported, they’re less likely to rely on you for every decision.
5. Establish “Notification-Free” Zones
Carve out sacred spaces in your day where you disconnect from notifications. Imagine enjoying a meal without your phone or starting your morning without checking your email before having coffee and breakfast. Sounds like a dream, right? Turn it into reality by banning notifications during these sacred times. Your nervous system will thank you.
6. Mindful Reactions Over Instant Responses
When you do hear a notification, take a moment to pause. Take a deep breath. Ask yourself, “Is this an emergency, or can it wait?” Nine times out of ten, it can wait. Pausing helps you regain control over your reactions and reduces unnecessary stress. You’re the boss; you set the pace.
The Benefits of Boundary-Setting
When you step out of the “notification hamster wheel,” you’re giving your mental health a break and setting a precedent for everyone around you. Leaders who prioritize their well-being model positive behavior for their team, inspire others to do the same, and set a powerful example, showing that success doesn’t have to come at the expense of mental peace.
When you manage the notifications on your phone, you’ll find that you have:
- Clarity: You’ll think more clearly and make better decisions without constant distractions.
- Focus: You’ll feel more present in your personal and professional life and get stuff done instead of juggling endless interruptions.
- Peace: You’ll Reduce feelings of resentment and regain a sense of control.
- Respect: Cultivate a healthier and more sustainable approach to leadership. Your team will admire your ability to balance accessibility with boundaries.
Final Thoughts
Being a boss doesn’t mean being available 24/7. It means leading with intention, setting boundaries, and protecting your peace. So the next time your phone buzzes, ask yourself: Does this need my attention right now, or can I take a deep breath, trust my boundaries, and reclaim control over my day?
Remember, you’re the leader—of your team, your career, and your well-being. Prioritize all three, and you’ll lead with strength and clarity.
I am a clinical psychologist in California and Maryland and offer complimentary 15-minute initial consultations. If you are a professional woman seeking counseling, you may click here to schedule an appointment.